Trust in a relationship is everything. Getting someone you can trust to spend your whole life with isn’t a child’s play. By all means, you should get a man who’s trustworthy. By all means, you should find a man whose ye is ye and whose nay is nay. We are humans. We lie. You lie. I lie. But when it comes to a relationship, you know you have to find someone who doesn’t tell lies for a living.
How can you find a guy who wouldn’t tell you lies when the truth would have been the easiest option? I can’t show you how. I can give you a clue.
Here is the clue.
#1. He always tells you to confirm from X
X is his best friend. Whenever you have a reason to distrust his answers, he gives you a lengthy explanation and ends it with “you can ask X, he was even there.” I’ve given you reasons not to trust your boyfriend’s best friend. Anytime he refers you to his best friend for a confirmation or otherwise of some deeds, you sure should know he’s trying to pull a fast one on you. If he constantly asks you to confirm issues from his best friend, it’s a red light for you to be careful with him.
#2. He pretends he didn’t see your call
He didn’t see your call and for some reason, his phone doesn’t register missed calls. Your missed calls. Isn’t that amazing? When you are with him, he can’t put his phone down. It is only when you are not with him that he puts his phone down and leaves it long enough to miss your call. Something can’t be right, don’t you think so? And because he doesn’t want you to see when he reads your WhatsApp messages, he’d turned off the blue tick and also turned off last seen. I smell mistrust somewhere. Do you smell it too?
#3. He pretends he doesn’t have friends
You’ve never met anyone he calls a friend. He’s never introduced you to anyone he calls a friend. And he tells you: “Babe, you’re all I have. Friends will destroy our beautiful relationship, that’s why I don’t have any.” That sounds romantic. That sounds like a guy who wants to sacrifice a friendship to keep who he loves. But ask this, “Who does he call with the phone in his hands? And most times that he’s on WhatsApp chatting, who does he chat with?” Now you should be worried.
#4. He can’t put his phone down
You’ve abandoned all important stuff to have a date with him. Probably you’re going to miss your favorite telenovela too. You want to be with him. He’s your world. You spend the night on a date with him and the only time you see his face clearly is when his phone’s screen lights up. You see him smiling whiles reading messages from the phone. You ask him who’s making him smile and he’ll say; “no one.” He’s the only person on earth “no one” can make him smile. You came alone to be with him. But he brought the world to the table.
#5. He can’t guess whom he’s talking to when you call him with a different line
The problem isn’t the fact that he can’t recognize your voice. Far from it. The problem starts when you ask him to guess who’s on the line. “Guess? I’m not good at guessing. I always get it wrong.” He’ll say. He’s not actually bordered about getting it wrong. He’s rather thinking of the worse that could happen if he should get it wrong. “If I say it’s Lucy and it’s rather Louisa, I’m dead. Louisa knows I don’t speak with Lucy anymore, so why would I even guessed it’s her?” So long and short of it all, no guessing.
#6. He has long explanations for “do you have a girlfriend”
Now you are sure about him. You want to go ahead to have a relationship with him. You want to be assured of one thing. Only one thing; that he doesn’t have a girlfriend. The answer from him should be straightforward. Yes. No. There shouldn’t be any terms and conditions. There shouldn’t be a long story about another girl he loved and she disappointed him and blah blah blah. Guys who are carrying the stories of their ex around probably didn’t let go and are likely to go back to the ex when things get right. Or better still, they are hurt and looking to use you for a cover-up.
#7. He Always calls you with pet names.
Having your boyfriend calling you with beautiful pet names is nice. Romantic actually. Today he calls you Cupcake, yesterday you were Apple pie, and tomorrow he’s going to call you with another sweet thing. That’s all nice. It shows what you mean to him. But you have a name. A name that would be on the marriage certificate if you two should end up married. Let him call you with that name most times. Probably he’d forgotten your name or he doesn’t want to mistake your name for another lady he was with last night. To be on a safer side, he’s decided all women he meets are cupcakes, apple pie and the rest of all other sugary foods. You are safe when your name is safe on his lips.
#8. He tells you his parents are strict
For some reason or two, you decided to date a guy who lives with his parent. Maybe you love him so much so that the fact that he’s living with his parent didn’t register to you as a problem. Now he doesn’t want to take you home. He tells you his parent are capable of blowing your head off when they see you’re dating their son. He tells you his last relationship ended because he took the girl home and dad nearly killed her. So you meet him in public places or a friend’s house when you want to be intimate. Are you waiting for me to tell you you can’t trust such a guy?
#9. He takes your number today and he’s all over you in the next minute.
Be wary of guys who try to take your number at hello. And be extra careful with those who get the number and they are all over you in the next minutes professing love and affection from heaven. If they got it from you, then they’ve taken it from others and they’ll get it from many others too.
#10. He keeps condoms in his wallet
Condoms come in a pack of three. He always has only one in his wallet. What happened to the other two? He’ll tell you he gave them to X and you can confirm with him if you like. Check number 1 to know what that means. He keeps condoms in his pocket, yet you don’t remember the last time he had one on when doing it with you. So who is the condom for? He can also say he went to HIV/AIDS program and it was shared. Well, you decide if he’s telling the truth.
This article originally appeared on nestaerskine